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The EZPZ Self-Esteem Test
The guide time for completion is 2 to 3 minutes.
1. Confidence
Thinking about your confidence levels, would you say
A: You only lack confidence in 1 or 2 specific situations, e.g. a phobia or whenever you’re the focus of attention. Perhaps you get anxious or nervous in formal, group or social situations.
OR B: You have never lacked confidence in any situation, and cannot imagine a situation occurring where you would.
OR C: Your lack of confidence extends to most areas of your life, in other words it’s a general rather than specific lack of confidence. And you do not compare yourself favorably to others.
2. Severity
Assuming 1C above applies, is the general lack of confidence
A: A recent development only, due to circumstances beyond your control, and contrary to how you used to feel for the most part of your life?
OR B: A feature of your life since adulthood?
OR C: Something you have always had, even in childhood?
3. Childhood
It is important to take your time to seriously consider your answer to the following questions.
Which one of A, B, C or D best describes your childhood?
A. Genuinely happy.
B. “Not so good.”
C. Really very bad, e.g. “Crap.”
D. “Can’t remember.”
4. Parenting
Throughout your childhood were your parents or main carers physically demonstrably affectionate to you? In other words, apart from perhaps bedtime or when you were ill or hurt, did they regularly hold, kiss or cuddle you?
A. Mother or main Female did.
OR B. Mother or main Female did not, or was not around.
AND C. Father or main Male did.
OR D. Father or main Male did not, or was not around.
Now add up your scores to discover where you are on the Self-Esteem scale.
1A=1, 1B=0, 1C=2; 2A=1, 2B=2, 2C=3; 3A=0, 3B=2, 3C=4, 3D=3; 4A=0, 4B=3, 4C=0, 4D=2
0-2 Congratulations to you and your parents. A secure upbringing with positive and loving role models means the world is your oyster.
Fine-tune yourself for success with Sessions 1, 4 and 5.
3-7 You sometimes feel vulnerable and lacking in self-assurance.
Address any negative programs with Sessions 1, 2, 4 and 5 so you can attract and accept abundance and satisfaction in every area of your life.
8-14 Your low self-esteem affects most areas of your life, especially relationships. The Self-Esteem Doctor prescribes Sessions 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5 so that you can address childhood issues and be the happy and confident child and adult you deserve to be.
#2 Self-Esteem Test
This more comprehensive diagnostic tool is an essential part of the preparation for playing self-development session 3. If you scored less than 7 on the EZPZ Test above, you might still like to take it to double-check your rating on the Self-Esteem scale. You can find it on the right.
The Self-Esteem Doctor's 5 Recommended self-development sessions
Session 1: The Confidence Booster – take advantage of this session first to get the whole of your mind, including your subconscious, on board straightaway with your new positive agenda. It will increase your sense of wellbeing in social and formal situations, and result in a huge improvement in how confident and relaxed you are in all your interactions with others. Especially good for when all eyes are on you.
Session 2: The Multi-Level De-Stressor – great not just for protecting you from everyday stress but also for gaining release from emotional baggage, negative mood states and many psychosomatic disorders and illnesses.
Session 3: Meet and Heal your Inner Child allowing you to permanently reverse the effects of a damaged childhood – a gentle yet powerful transformational process. Recommend playing once a day for a month before moving onto the next session.
Session 4: The Supreme Performance and Self-Esteem Booster session allows you to rewrite any negative programs, after which you’ll be unstoppable - confident and self-assured in every situation and with any new challenge!
Session 5: Your Goals – knock out any remnants of self-doubt and go for success and happiness. You will literally make it happen!
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"The quality of your life is not measured by what you have and what you own, but rather by how you feel about yourself." (Costa Lambrias)
Self-Esteem Test #2
The guide time for completion is 5 to 10 minutes.
This self-diagnostic tool looks at the conditioning we receive from our early days and how that programming from our main carers has made us who we are, with unwanted patterns of behaviour that with therapy you can now begin to change.
Your relationship with the world and yourself
1. Do you compare yourself unfavourably to others? Are other people “better” than you? Does that apply to colleagues, friends, and even partners (past or present)?
2. Do you hold back in letting new people get to know you? Is that because you think they would find you uninteresting or even boring? Or is it because you feel vulnerable – they might take advantage or even hurt you? And if you answered, as many of my clients have, that it was because “They wouldn’t like me”, then let me ask you “Why not? Why wouldn’t they like you?” Most people cannot answer this question because the feeling of not being likeable is not a logical one; nevertheless, until this inner child is met and loved by you, it’s a very powerful assumption and conviction!
3. Are you a people-pleaser? Do you find it difficult to say “no” to others? Consequently, do people at work, or even at home, “dump” on you? This fear of Rejection (and in some cases, Abandonment, by partners or family) has its roots in your insecurities and not in reality!
4. Do you hide your true feelings, especially when a person has said or done something to upset you or make you feel angry or sad? Do you say you’re “fine” when you’re not? Are you used to sub-serving your feelings, and perhaps even your needs, to those of others? Like a volcano, do you then “blow up” out of proportion to what’s happening at the time because of the pressure of long held suppressed true feelings?
5. Do you attract needy, withdrawn or abusive partners? Is that a “safer” relationship, feeling needed, than a so-called “normal” relationship? Do you feel you don’t deserve a better relationship? If you have a history of partners who were abusive (usually mentally / emotionally, not just physically violent or sexually abusive) or alcoholic, did this in any way mirror your own parents’ relationship?
6. Whenever a partner has told you that they loved you, have you been able to feel that love from them? Or do you disbelieve them? Have you been able to feel love for them? If so, how easy has it been for you to tell them that you love them?
7. Do you feel that you disappoint others: your own family, your parents? Do you feel that you haven’t met their expectations of you, or your own expectations of yourself? Have your parents actually told you, or made it clear to you, what their expectations of you were, or have you just assumed the burden of these implied expectations? What are these expectations that others have of you; what are yours, and what is the difference, if any, between the two?! Whether those expectations are implied or explicit, are you ready now to let the weight of them go??
All of the above are symptomatic of a childhood lacking security, approval or affection.
How to Score Self-Esteem Test #2
In each of the 7 categories if you could identify with the first question and/or most of its content, award yourself points as follows:
1=2, 2=2, 3=3, 4=2, 5=3, 6=2 points each for not being able to feel love from and/or for, or express it; 7=2.
Totals
0-3 You require audio self-development sessions 1, 4 and 5
4-8 You require sessions 1, 2, 4 and 5
9-20 Heal your childhood with sessions 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5 (see left for Sessions)
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